Make me smile today.

I feel like typing today, for the 25 minutes before I go get dinner.
Do you know those certain moments when you're walking alone to class or anywhere really
and you come to a sudden realization?
Today was one of those days and all I want to do
is talk to my high school friends like we always would.

We'd all sprawl out on couches, on the floors of living rooms, while sex and the city or law and order svu was on in the background.
leftovers from the fridge we raided, sitting in disgusting crusty outfits that are comfy.
and bitch.
about everything.

And like, our friends are all so psychotic and emotional so its great and it never ceases to make me feel better
cause today was one of those weird days
where I realized things
I kinda wish I didn't see.


But on the other hand, this weather is stellar.
But just, like, this day kinda sucks.

And keep in mind i'm probably super over exaggerating this.
I'm just frustrated with registering for classes, cause I have so many class conflicts, and i have an essay rough draft due tomorrow, as well as a term paper I need to be working on.
But i just got a huge surge of longing for my best friends. and now we're scattered all over the country, so it's kinda sad.

And all of this of course is connected to so much of a bigger issue, and it's all so confusing and overwhelming for a teenage college kid.
And I'm so angry at some people, but it's frustrating cause it's hard to even be mad at someone when they live across the country from you.
Cause it makes it feel like we're living in separate worlds.
And I guess that's the hardest part about today.